Fruity’s 5th Birthday “Experience”
Fruity. Tagged as the best student night in Leeds, encapsulating all 5 bars of Leeds University Union (well, until midnight after which it encapsulates the 3 nightclub-esque bars: Stylus, Pulse and Mine)
Well, last night it was Fruity’s 5th Birthday (if you didn’t already guess from the title) and what an experience it was!
I’ve never really been much of a fan of clubbing (says the guy who goes to Bondi more than he goes to lectures!) and my first Fruity experience was a little off-putting. (No, there’s not going to be any details on why… :-p)
So, anyway, this being my 2nd Fruity Experience, I decided to push the experience of the 1st Fruity Experience to the back of my experience memory, and try to experience the Experience without expectation.
(Apologies for the slight over-use of the word “experience” in the preceeding paragraph.)
(And for the forthcoming overuse of brackets.)
(The parenthesis type. Not the shelf holding type.)
(Though y’all already knew that…)
Right, (I must stop drifting off at a tangent) I went with 4 of my housemates (I live with 5 girls, whose names will be changed to protect the innocent. *chuckle* ‘cos these girls are REAL innoncent 
) and two of their friends.
So, drinking started at our gaff, where we all had various concoctions of drink (or was that just me? Mountain Dew and Bells whiskey, Fanta Lemon and Bells… balls - I drank baaaad things! *eek!*) and we all proceeded to try and drag the final housemate out, but she wasn’t having any of it. She missed out. Big style. (I’m getting all enthusiastic and building this up now, and it’s just gonna be soooo anti-climatic! Meh!)
OK, stuff between here and Fruity is actually really boring, and most probably a waste of bandwidth, so I’ll shorten it and bullet point it:
- I have discovered that one of my housemates (henceforth affectionately known as ‘Neville’) claims to be able to fit her head in one cup of another housemate’s bra (she shall be known as ‘Bob’). Which I thought was an interesting tidbit of info.
- There was a big kerfuffle at the corner of Henry Price Flats involving the police (1 plod, 1 car and a Landrover - why so many Police??) and a group of ‘youths’ (incidentally none of which were wearing Burberry…) That was intriguing, but not that intriguing.
- I discovered the “Emerald Isle” - a liver killingly nasty concoction of spirits and juice that gives a kick so hard it parallels Jonny Wilkinson and his “Boot of Pain”. It goes thus: 2oz White Rum, 2oz Vodka, 2oz Gin, 1oz Blue Curacao and, as the guy who ordered it put it “a yellow drink”. Mix it all together in a pint glass and it turns a deadly shade of green (hence the name “Emerald Isle”!!) This was at the Old Bar where I work and got very drunk once.
- Party bags and party hats were being given out, but we all were heartily disappointed by the contents: Two flyers, a lollipop, and a party-popper. 1 party-popper!! IT WAS THE FIFTH BIRTHDAY FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! THERE WERE ONLY 4 ITEMS IN THE BAG!! *grumble*
- Mine is a decent little bar place thing. I have discovered this having never graced its entrance before.
- Pulse is also a decent little bar place. Though I already knew this fact, I just had to reiterate it
Right, that’s it for the bullet points. I may go back to them if the continuous prose I’m spieling out starts getting crap again
So, we’re in Stylus and dancing away to some music (2 of my other housemates, ‘Cedric’ and ‘Randolf’, Neville and myself - Bob was with her coursemates and Neville’s friends had both gone AWOL) when they brought on the showgirls. SHOWGIRLS!!! 4 rather tasty looking female specimens, 2 of which were obviously wearing the wrong bikini top things (1 had a cup size too large, and the other was popping out from the bottom of hers… As this was mentioned to me, I became a little transfixed… Meh! I’m only human!!)
So, the evening progressed and
This is getting boring again. Continuous prose sucks. Bullet time. (Cue: ‘MC Hammer’)
- Saw a girl there who I met last Friday at the Computer Society Social thing, who basically encapsulates everything I desire in a girl: She knows what I’m talking about when I go on one of my techno-rants!!And she’s good-looking.
Gorgeous in fact.But that’s a bonus.
A huge bonus, mind you Yes, this does mean I’m attracted to her - but I’ve more chance of becoming immortal than getting with her. Like I said, she’s gorgeous - she could take her pick of any man that she wants in an instant.
- Neville, Cedric and Randolf all decided to attack each other’s cleavages with confetti stuff that was being blown around the room. Bob was pulling confetti out of her bra for at least 20 minutes after being ‘attacked’ by everyone (myself and her coursemates included)
Which was funny.
Especially as our front room has a small layer of confetti on the floor.
Though you really had to be there to appreciate the humour.Stop looking at me like that. I hate you all! *runs to a corner and cries*
- We decided to get chips from the chippy in Headingley. Fish, chips and gravy. YUMM!! As we walked home, Neville told us of a guy who lived on the street we were walking up who tried to kiss her (yes, Neville has a boyfriend - sorry lads, can’t pimp this one out maybe one of the other three who are, to my knowledge, free agents :-D), to which Cedric decided to shout his name at the top of her voice whilst outside his house, prompting the girls to quicken their pace. I didn’t really care - I had my fish, chips and gravy.
So, that was basically encapsulates my experience of Fruity’s 5th Birthday Experience. This isn’t that juicy or debauch as many other things I could write about, but meh! If you want debauch, just go to a party at B’s house! Tee hee hee…
Laters!